Fighting, Concussions and Suicide in Hockey

As kids, a lot of boys and girls around me were taught to idolize and strive to become their favorite sport stars. Who could blame them? Everybody wants fame and notoriety and especially the money, but at what cost. This subject touched me deeply as I have been on all sides of this argument and I can tell you it is not as black and white as its seems. I was one of those kids, not by choice but because my father told me I was to be one of them. When I was in elementary school the experimentation on what I was good at began, I was put into different sports, in soccer the shoe didn’t fit and I couldn’t skate for the life of me so it was decided that i was going to be a football player. I wasn’t allowed to complain because I was “lucky” that I had size and strength and my parents were paying for my seasons. At the time I hated everything to do with football and my position, all i did was hit, every whistle I would hit and get hit and this was the thing I hated most in life, in all my years of football I must have racked up 4-6 concussions. And all I got back from this was my dads approval and post traumatic stress. I played football from elementary all the way until last year, quitting was hard, the sport was part of me at this point, i was introduced to friends and family as “My son James, yes hes a monster, he is a giant, you should see what he does on the field!!”

Now one might ask why someone in my position would stay and continue playing and the answer is simply that you are stuck. In my case just discussing how much I disliked the sport would start an argument, the old be a man was thrown around a bunch of times and i cant blame anyone for saying this to me. After all look what football gave me, i was finally confident and proud and I wasn’t being bullied anymore. I loved the attention i got from my dad and everyone around me yet I despised all of them so much for minimizing me to my sport at the same time. The sport is also a family and I have made countless brothers while playing. My coaches volunteered their time for me and all the kids on the team, I will forever be in their debt, nevertheless I can never take my years of football back and all the violence and hitting is stuck with me now.

Thus the situation is not black or white at all, as a player how can your opinion count when your whole livelihood is thanks to the fans and the forefathers of the sport that had it way harder? What can you do if the answer to all the points you raise is man up? I think that in sport, many men feel similar to me, I don’t believe that all hockey players crave violence and fighting but i think that as a player you are conditioned to love what you do. Living by the “code” and being a “real man” are conditioned habits that are harmful yet players are formed in such a way that they see violence in sport as fulfilling.

The point of this blog is not to diminish the work of athletes or the sports they play, in fact sports and competition will never go away and it is important to embrace these things. I also believe that my opinion and life story is similar to thousands of people just like me who love their sport but understand the pain it caused them. In terms of professional players I think that it is important to understand the importance of the individual over the sport, team or even the fans. Although the fans make a sport it would be selfish to demand that fights and certain forms of physical contact remain in a sport if it obviously tens to lead to negative consequences for the majority of players.

As a final point it is important to think about future generations. Players today must set an example to young and impressionable kids, as well it is important for there to be a disassociation of violence in sport and the emphasis on competition. Contact in sports does not have to be violent, it in my opinion fans and toxic masculinity that push the notion of physical and emotional violence for entertainment. Players must be given the final say, as of course it is their sport, but as fans and allies it is important to create a safe and understanding environment that encourages true dialogue.

I think some interesting points that we heard about last Tuesday fall in three basic categories. Primarily we heard some interesting facts about gender and how there is a small/ insignificant number of women who take place in the alt right movement. Secondly we heard about race and how it seemed that the major players in the alt right movement (notably nazis) were white. Finally what seemed to me as being the most interesting part of this presentation was that members of the far right/ neo nazi group that was infiltrated were more likely to have come from less severe right leaning group, in this case, a misogynist group called the red pill.

So an interesting part of the presentations that tied in nice with our course was the role that men played in the leadership of these right leaning groups. In reading literature from this course it becomes clear the role men play in conflict and leadership along with conflict resolution. Example : Why men would declare war on half of the worlds population (women) instead of developing social skills to cure celibacy.

Secondly, the racial aspect to the alt right was an important topic at the talk. Obviously the Neo nazis were white but what was interesting to me was the way this tied in with the mass murderer/ sociopath profile which tends to be isolated lone white male.

Finally and to me the most interesting point brought up in the presentation was this idea of men following other men down a rabbit hole. These members of alt right groups aren’t just born fascists, they follow important figures they look up to, the same way incels look up to mass murderers.

I believe that Kimmel is making a point about the weight countless institutions place unequally relative to ones gender and therefore forces roles onto us. He mentioned “Gendered” processes but basically this term is speaking about the biological needs of the genders. Kimmel states that the institutions that happen to pay the highest, his example being medicine, make it hard for those who want to get pregnant (women) to follow through their studies and reach high positions. Basically the stressful and time consuming process of reaching the top of the job hierarchy filters out women by making it easier for men to follow through with their studies. This process is repeated constantly anywhere you look and therefore reinforces the “Gender order” as Kimmel puts it. This inequality relates to the 4th episode of “Man Enough” when the subject of rape allegations come up. Why does the justice system always side with the man? Why is the first question always something like what is she wearing or did she lead him on? The same arguments come up when people ask why there isn’t enough women in high positions. The answer should never be, “oh she got pregnant” or “she had to take care of kids” or even worse, “her husband was always gone for work, who else would take care of the home”. Pressure should not be placed unequally on the woman as this just continues the gender divide in the workforce.

Lastly, Kimmel seems to define masculinity as a socialization process individuals have undergone in early childhood. Indeed our notions of a masculine identity simply stem from associations we have made as a society and interactions between individuals. As a result, these constructed ideas have become “fixed” and “static”.Therefore difficult to decompose into its individual parts. One’s identity is most commonly observed through behaviours: as Kimmel emphases on the significance society attributes to what one does. In other words, ” Doing gender is a lifelong process of performances” (Kimmel, p.4). With that being said, the concept of masculinity is slowly changing as men adopt non-stereotypical behavioural traits. Consequently, this is challenging the original concept of masculinity and bringing a wave of social change. This goes beyond defining one’s gender but rather transforming social systems. Redefining such concepts requires great change within current institutions. Such that women should be taken into account when designing an educational program in the medical field as give equal opportunities. This is only possible through the changes associations made in regards to masculinity. This relates to the video showcased in class, ” Man enough” as they explain their role models growing up. One of the hosts mentioned that he had grown with a violent masculine influence which led him to associate manliness with being tough, in charge, etc. Although this might reflect behaviours of others, these actions do not solely determine masculinity. In fact, it is only when he became an adult and through various interactions that he came to realize how his perception of gender was incorrect. Interacting with other as well as media representation of what a “man” is supposed to be, are all factors leading to the misattribution of gender. Of course, new associations are being made and who knows what masculinity might signify in 10 years from now! Moreover, new gender norms are being created as to better represent our current society.

The man who has inspired me the most in life is my father. He is the most honest and honorable family man I know and I could not ask for a better role model. My father started a family, his own company and works hard to support us. He inspired me to love wildlife and to be conscious of the natural world. he encouraged me to follow the sciences and he is the reason I am studying to become a wildlife technician. I think for someone to be inspirational they must not only be a teacher but also someone who pushes you forward in life to be great.

Bacalla